THE EXPERIENCE OF APRIL 19, 2005

I don't think anyone of us will ever tire of hearing or reading an account of how others experienced that momentous afternoon when Benedict became our Pope. This space is for posting your own experience, or anything that you may have heard or read about the experience of others on that transcendent day.

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Beatrice just posted in the French section an account of a Swiss girl of the unusual circumstances under which she lived that day. It was published on 5/19/05 in Christicity.com, a Catholic site in French, which calls itself "the portal of the New Evangelization." Here is my translation-

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Veronique, 25 years old, shares with us the unusual way she experienced the election of Pope Benedict XVI. Having followed the event under unusual circumstances, she sees the working of the Holy Spirit in the experience she had.
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Yesterday, Tuesday evening, I had a class till 5:30 p.m.

I left school and proceeded to the bus station. It was 5:40. It was cold. My bus was not due in till 6:30...So I decided to enter the new commercial center in front of the station to be warm. I sat on a bench and started to read about St. Faustina, my favorite saint [a Polish nun canonized by John-Paul II in 2000].

I had barely started when I got an SMS message from my mother: “Habemus Papam!” I told myself- “I must look for a TV right away.”

But where would I look for one in Fribourg? The only solution was to try FNAC (a nationwide chain store that sells books, CDs, tapes and electronic appliances] – they sell TV sets. Surely, at least one would be tuned to the event in Rome.

I rush towards the store and look for the TV section. All the screens are connected to the same Channel – the same stupid clip (with sound) is on all the screens! I approach the section anyway.I find three persons in front of me who seem to be fixing a screen. They are so close together I can’t even see the screen. But once I am close enough to them, I see…

Suspense!…

The Piazza that is so dear and recognizable above all others: St. Peter’s Square. And an immense crowd, immense… who are waiting to see their new Pope whose name no one knows yet.

The waiting is almost palpable…The image is monotonous (although) it is a multicolored crowd. At the bottom of the screen, a running strip announces in 6 languages that the Conclave has elected a new Pope. Super, but who?

To pass the time, I look at my companions – two girls and a man, who seemed to be a salesman, or probably the section head. Seeing that we were all intersted in watching the event –and not at all in the magnificent flat screen which awaited a buyer – he turned on the sound. Oh, the Holy Spiritis powerful!

At St. Peter’s Square, the crowd continues to grow. The wait goes on. I know the two girls by sight. I think we go to the same school. Or maybe, I have seen them at Mass. It is odd that we find ourselves together in an appliance shop to watch the election of a Pope! One feels the communion in prayer that unites all Christians- we feel at home everywhere because God welcomes us. Obviously, there is no tabernacle here. (Instead there is) this screen which links us, “live”, to what is taking place at St. Peter’s Square…

Two boys join us and ask if the name of the new Pope has been announced. The salesman comes and goes… There are few customers and he has the time... For once, I appreciate the utility of networks which summarize the news continuously.

I must say that since Easter, I have certainly watched TV more than I ever did in the past three years combined!

Suddenly, the cameras cease to show the crowds and focuses on the famous window which should open shortly – at least, according to the commentator who tries, for better or worse (often worse) to mark time by telling us the same thing 50 times over. The drapes seem to move – we all hold our breath…

False alarm. The wait continues. A customer who is comparing the prices of different flat screens approaches us with her son. She stops to watch. There are now 8 of us, planted in front of a TV set inside this FNA store in Fribourg!…Well, I will spare you the rest of that wait.

Let us pass on to the long-awaited moment.

But first, I want to stress again the feeling of joy and communion that emanated from this strange scene. The solemnity of the event has created a complicity among us. It’s funny how some unusual events serve to establish a communication (even if non-verbal) among individuals who would never otherwise have even looked at each other under normal circumstances! (As one who comes from a very small village, I am always amazed by the indifference shown by people who pass each other without seeing each other!)

Suddenly, the window (on the Loggia) opens. Once again, we hold our breath … But no, it was only to draw the red drapes together. By now, it was past 6:30 and my bus has left without me! But Providence has given me a screen with sound, and I am not going to leave until it is over! Though the next bus won’t be till 9:30.

Just then, the man who has the duty to announce the good news appears. “With the words that we have heard over and over in the past several hours: "Carissimi fratelli et sorelli, chers frères et soeurs, liebe Brüder und Schwester, annontio vobis gaudium magnum : habemus Papam ! Dominum Josephum"... (obviously I don’t know the first names of all the cardinals, but Joseph- I could think of only one! Was it possible????)

"Dominum Josephum Cardinalem Ratzinger ! " (No doubt now- it is him!)

And shortly after, he appears – he of whom I had heard so much but whom I had not really looked at losely before! I am comforted: (in him) we have a firm shepherd to guide us towards Christ! Thank you, Lord!!!...

Our little group disperses. Only the two girls and I remain. The tension has gone… Now (it’s time for) the first words from the new Pope, words that the whole world now knows, so touching in their simplicity and gentleness. And then the blessing urbi et orbi.

What would I do? Make the sign of the Cross inside the store? Or simply say it in my heart? After all, Jesus knows my intention, and that’s what counts. But no! I don’t care what the others think. I make the sign of the Cross. In communion with the new Holy Father, on whom so many labels have already been tagged.

It is at that moment that I realize the magnitude of what awaits him- it must be terrifying!

It is 7 o’clock. A salesman starts turning off the screens, one after the other. The commercial center is empty. I go out to look for something to eat…

But the Lord is good. (We know that, but that’s not a reason for not saying it.) He made it possible that because of the cold, I went into a mall where a TV screen awaited me, tuned to the channel that I needed. He “arranged” it so that the salesman came and turned on the sound for us.

He allowed 5 young believers to find themselves together in front of a TV screen, creating inside a store a small Christian group united in prayer.

Most of all, He has given us a Shepherd! And we are no longer orphans.

Thank you, my Lord!

Véronique Pythoud, Fribourg, Switzerland

Hello again, anglophone friends!

Teresa, I decided to post my memories about last April month describing my feelings at Ratzinger’s election and the way I ended up loving him. It is a quite faithful translation of the story I already posted in the Italian section ("Indagine cattivella" thread). Hope you’ll enjoy yourselves (and, of course, forgive my mistakes ... : )

“Defintely I was supporting him during the Conclave though I must admit my fondness of him had flourished in my heart only very recently in that “fatal” April month.

In the time of JPII’s decay I had often wondered who I would have liked to see as his successor and I had come to the conclusion Cardinal Tettamanzi (currently ruling the Diocese in Milan) would fit the position well, since I knew him to be extremely accomplished in doctrinal matters and at the same time very wise in his decisions. Of course I was acquainted with the name of Cardinal Ratzinger and his being Head of the CDF, I had casually listened to some interviews with him and heard what other people told about him but, silly me , I had never read one of his books or listened to a homily or speech he had uttered in first person. Therefore I was not even aware I did not know him, just his reputation, which often says too much or too little of the real person behind, but never the bare truth. And worst, I took for granted all the slogans he was usually labelled with: "God’s rottweiler", the "Panzerkardinal", the "Black Inquisitor" etc. These being the scenario, no wonder he made me feel rather ill-at-ease and I was afraid he could come out as a fundamentalist Catholic, sort of Jorge of Burgos (the evil fictional character portrayed in the novel “The Name of The Rose” by Umberto Eco, which most of you probably read ).

Everything changed in the very moment I found myself listening to his words, not the words other people had told and written about him, but his own words, starting with the reflections during the latest Via Crucis (Way of The Cross), the homily at JPII’s funeral and the homily at the Pro Eligendo Pontifice Mass. Within a few days my opinion about him was screwed up and I felt literally fascinated by his beautiful speeches, the deep ideas he was able to express, his being firm and kind at the same time while exhorting us Christians to wake up from a lazy and dormant faith, the contagious hope he was able to instil in my heart when he spoke about the joy of a full devotion to Christ.

In that moment I felt sure, in spite of all the things I had heard about him and which (mea culpa! ) I had took for granted, that he and only he was the man I wished to lead the Catholic Church because I had realised following him I could go deeper in my understanding Faith, the real meaning of human life and I would be able to re-start my way toward a true Catholicism. And when the Conclave began I began to pray for him to be elected.
I hoped the Conclave would be short, since everybody said long voting would mean Ratzinger’s opponents had succeeded in their stopping his candidature. So, you can imagine my heart filling with pure hope at the sight of white smoke puffs rising from Sistina Chapel on that cloudy April 19th afternoon.
Finally when the “Dominum Josephum” name was announced my hopes increased but I could not be 100% sure yet, for I knew there were a few other cardinals bearing the same first name. It seemed to me a century or longer before Cardinal Medina added “Sanctae Romanae Ecclesiae Cardinalem Ratzinger”… and finally I allowed myself to rejoice.

I saw him appearing at the Loggia and suddenly I felt concerned for him, it struck me how heavy a burden the Lord had loaded him. The unpleasant, uncomfortable role of Head of CDF before, the heir of JP The Great since now on, which would make him hardly welcome by the crowds.
When he asked for our prayers I promised I would never miss a day without invoking God’s protection over him and I am keeping my promise.
However, it is not my goal to idolize Papa Ratzinger, I know he’s no hero, he’s just a man, a man who committed himself to serve Christ and the Holy Church. A service which is not free of dangers and temptations and seductions, the seduction of power in first place because a Pope is a “powerful” man and it must be difficult at times to stay humble and modest. But I am confident he’ll always be able to keep far from such temptations as long as he is refusing any personality cult. This is also clear evidence that he was sincere and not a hypocrite when in his first speech defined himself “a simple and humble worker in the Lord’s vineyard”.
I know he’s not perfect, sure he’s got his flaws and makes mistakes, but I’ll never cease to thank him for his having said last spring the words my soul needed to be awakened and caressed with.
And also I am in his debt because if one day I’ll come out a better person, if I’ll be able to leave my inner desert and make my life a small "garden of God" I’ll owe it to him, of which I’ll be grateful forever .”

DISCIPULA...Thank you very much for for sharing with us your personal story of what I call the Benedict effect. I hope others will be encouraged to do the same, as I sincerely believe
thst Benedict, as Pope and Joseph Ratzinger, has a unique ability to win people instantaneously, even people who had never heard of him the moment before! Testimony after testimony bear witness to the uniqueness and the power of the Benedict effect, and it is good to be able to document what we can of it.

In fact, I was just preparing to translate two posts which AnnaLena, a new member of the German section in the American forum, had to say about her own story.

ANNALENA'S ACCOUNT

AnnaLena from Munich recently joined the German section of the RFC,and I have translated her first two postings here-

I am happy that I will be able to exchange views with you about Pope Benedict – serious as well as less serious things – as I wish to clarify why I – an ex-Catholic- am so enthusiastic over the new Pope (and not only because he
looks so good!).

I have been carrying the Ratzinger-virus around since I saw and heard him in the replay of an old TV interview last April. Was this friendly, attractive man, with a gift for lively conversation, the Panzerkardinal who was being blamed for everything [that critics find wrong with the Catholic Church]?

But I was completely won over after the homily he delivered at his installation Mass. For someone “searching” like me, his words were very encouraging. Since then, the question of Faith has once again come to the foreground I[in my life]. And it seems that I am not alone [in this experience]…

In the second post, she comments on the “Panzerkardinal” image she had of him:
Unfortunately that was the drawer into which most people enjoyed to stick him in; and the media was full of it.
Peter Seewald in his new book has made it clear what usually happened whenever an article or report was to come out about Cardinal Ratzinger.

First of all, they would always choose a picture in which he looks very serious, and at all costs, to avoid any picture that shows him smiling, or laughing, God forbid! I find that terrible. It is unbelievable what influence the press can have on someone’s ‘image.’ They can either over-hype someone they find praiseworthy or take great pains to give the worst possible image [of someone they don’t like]. Above all, through headline-making words like ‘Panzerkardinal.’ And why? Simply because he was carrying out his job at the CDF perfectly and he would not move wherever the wind blew? Apparently, that was enough basis for the press [to run him down], and the media in his own country have been the world champions in such negative reporting. I was so gratified by the reaction of the Italians to our Papa’s election – they seemed to have collectively flipped for him.

And what about us Germans? Yes, there was “Wir sind Papst” [We are Pope! – the headline used by BILD, the largest-circulated newspaper in Germany], but then? What we have had to put up with!…

Kirsty, the moderator of the Germans section, answers:
I understand – he arouses my total enthusiasm too. And as you say, he is so good-looking – that’s a fact, and why shouldn’t we say it? But there’s more to him, of course - he has the gift of bringing people closer to the Faith. He does it in his own way, and it works! We could not have had a better Pope. I believe he was destined from the very beginning to become Pope. I believe that very strongly...

This Pope was sent to us by God, and he has a beauty that comes from within. Thanks to him, I believe once again in values which I had thought had gone. I really think this was all meant to be.

Just to set the right atmosphere for this thread, I am reprinting a beautiful montage that our French sister and
photo-wiz Sylvie has just prepared from a short video-clip of a Spanish TV report that day. She added a few frames from her own archive.

Benedict's expression in all these pictures fills me with overwhelming "tenerezza"...




The first two rows are from the Spanish video; the third row is from Sylvie's archive.

Beatrice in the French section found this article in which a French priest who lives in Rome recounts his reaction to Benedict’s election on April 19. The article appeared in the June issue of “Feu et Lumiere”, a monthly Catholic magazine.
Herewith, my translation -

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Editor's Note: Many things have been said about Benedict XVI since his election. It seemed important to us to allow our readers to make their own judgment. Father Ide, who lives in Rome, tells us how he experienced the event and the immense hope that fills his heart.

I think I will remember all my life the moment when Benedict XVI was elected. I was in my office which overlooks St. Peter’s Square. It was 3:50 p.m. I had to make a long-distance call, and the operator said:”We have a new Pope!” -“No!”- “Yes!”…Well in that case, my call could wait…

I looked out the window. The police were clearing the sagrato, the space right in front of the entrance to St. Peter’s, where important celebrations take place. The crowd was swelling fast. Then, the bells of St. Peter’s started ringing, driving away all my doubts. After 4 ballots and within less than 24 hours, a new Pope had been chosen. The Piazza filled up with unprecedented speed: businessmen, familes, children, all Rome seemed to arrive, running to St. Peter's.

16:40 The window on the Loggia of Benedictions had hardly started to open when a cry of joy ran through the crowd.

What followed, you have all seen. First, we found out who the new Pope is – “Josephum…Ratzinger”. And then the name he had chosen, “Benedictus XVI”.

Nevertheless, I felt myself oddly ambivalent. On the one hand, I thought, “How well-prepared this new Pope is!” On the other hand, I could not bring myself to rejoice. For me, Cardinal Ratzinger was and could only be the Prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, chosen by John Paul II to
help him guard the treasury of the Faith, though with an openness to doctrinal debate that was incomparable.

I also remembered some opinions that had been reported of his years as Archbishop of Munich: that he was more a doctor rather than a pastor. But most of all, I imagined all the negative reactions that would come and I was saddened in advance.

Unfortunately, I was not wrong. The same evening, the false judgments, the caricatures, the unfair criticisms started to air. We have since heard everything said against him, including the unimaginable and the unsupportable. But these criticisms require our discernment, because they mask a diversity of different internal attitudes towards Joseph Ratzinger.

At one extreme, we find a hatred that is destructive and lying, that dares to say Benedict XVI had colluded with Nazism, a charge that amounts to the most inadmissible calumny. In his admirable autobiography, which has been translated in French, Ratzinger tells how at age 17, he refused, despite the jeers of his friends, to join the SS militia by affirming that he planned to become a Catholic priest.

The more moderate feed their anger by trite arguments that “he is too conservative.” Behind all this misinformed and sectarian anger, one senses fear.

One person told me: “I love the Church. I loved John Paul II. I did not have any a priori objections to Benedict XVI as I did not know anything about him. On the contrary, when I saw his face on television, I liked him at first sight. But afterwards, all that I have heard of him makes me afraid that the Church will lose the beautiful openness that his predecessor had brought to it.” We then talked about the new Pope’s personality, and I could see confidence gradually replacing my friend’s fear.

But there is also sadness. We need some time to mourn John Paul II and to fully welcome his successor without comparing them. The Vicar of Christ is not Christ, and if Benedict XVI does not have all the qualities of John Paul, the reverse is equally true.

Some anecdotes often reveal the man far more than long discourses. For instance, a group of American pilgrims now recall that one day, at St. Peter’s Square, they asked a priest to take their pictures. He did so, gladly, and they asked him to pose with them. Imagine their surprise to see that the obliging priest in the picture is now the Pope!

After the Pope’s inaugural Mass, a simple man, who says he barely knows how to write, said wondrously: “I understood everything he said in his homily. And yet, it lasted all of 35 minutes.”

A theologian on the prestigious International Theologic Commission, of which Cardinal Ratzinger was president [ex-officio, as CDF Prefect], recalls: “It often happened that we would lose ourselves in endless debates that were increasingly complex. After listening, the Cardinal had his say, offering his point of view which, almost always, reconciled opposing views, and even better, clarified them.”

And someone told me: “When the time comes that the world will say goodbye to Ratzinger, the high and the mighty will be surprised to see they will be surrounded by beggars and hobos, those whom the Cardinal greeted each day when he met them on the street, stopping to exchange a few words and to hand them alms.”

How better to describe the man’s simplicity, his concern for the poorest, his openness, his exceptional intelligence? These are qualities that the faithful began to discover in the first few days of his Papacy. But they were always there, even when he was a cardinal.

There are those who are concerned about his “intransigence.” But they mistake his sense (and defense) of the truth for intransigence. Today, to speak of love and solidarity and compassion will elicit only unanimity. But some contrast what they take to be all-tolerant love with a truth they consider to be “exclusive”. But isn’t truth the greatest good needed by the soul? Benedict XVI, who in his inaugural homily recalled at length the significance of the pallium, does not separate love and truth.

There are those who are unhappy about his “conservatism.” But didn’t Christ himself say that "not the smallest letter…will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished”(Mt 5, 18)? And who will dare to say that Christ is “conservative”?

There are those who are concerned about his stand in matters of ecumenism and inter-religious dialog. It is to forget that Ratzinger worked alongside Protestant theology faculties during his university career, that he sent his first Papal letter to the Jewish community in Rome, that he speaks modern Greek fluently, that he is a friend of the Patriarch of Moscow, that in all the liturgical celebrations since the death of John-Paul, the Vatican has allowed [to use John Paul’s metaphor] both lungs of the Church, the East and the West, to breathe freely.

I think hope will prevail over any fears if we adopt a resolutely theological attitude towards the election process itself at the Conclave. First, it required a two-thirds majority. And it required that each cardinal, before placing his ballot into the urn, pronounce the following oath: “I take as my witness Christ who will judge me, that I cast my vote for the person who I judge should be elected.”

Benedict was elected by a great majority of his brother cardinals from all over the world. The fact was more evident and significant because the process was quite short.

Afterwards, a passage from his homily on April 24 gave me a sense of joyous hope about the new Pope: “I do not need to present a program of government…My true program of government is not do my will, not to pursue my ideas, but, with the whole Church, to listen to the word and the will of the Lord and to let myself be guided by him in such a way that it will be God himself who will guide the Church at this hour in our history.”

A man endowed with all the gifts he has puts himself entirely in the hands of God – that is a winning formula! After more than 20 years of testing and calumnies of all sorts that have come his way, he has learned to pardon unconditionally. A gentle and humble man, his heart was “Christified” in his previous office, preparing him in turn for his new and crushing mission as Vicar of Christ.

Finally, how can one not think that John Paul II must have prayed for his successor, and prayed in particular for this successor? Benedict has said he feels his predecessor’s hand holding him firmly by the hand. From the day after he was elected, my heart has felt much lighter – now it is in a state of thanksgiving and deep confidence.

The past has proven that our predictions often go wrong. Who would have thought that John XXIII, whom everyone said would simply be a “transitional” Pope, would call the Second Vatican Council?

Moreover, the history of the past two centuries shows that the Church has often been blessed with Popes who have led incontestably saintly lives.

Ratzigirl opened the Papa Ratzinger Forum in early May. It was not until mid-June that she posted her personal account of how she succumbed to the Benedict effect. She did it two days after coming back from the Sunday Angelus of 6/19/05 at St. Peter’s, two months since the great event. However, I am posting my translation of the earlier events first -
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It’s late…I should go to bed because I have two hard days ahead of me…But I’m still up… on my PC, audio and video are synchronized to the Vatican webcam in St. Peter’s Square…I’m waiting to see a light go on in the Apostolic Palace… He is sleeping…I am awake…

I am beset by confused memories as well as by some which are very clear indeed… Confused memories of how some time ago, I had every chance to meet the then-Cardinal on the street [had I wanted to]… and of not having done anything about it, such was my total indifference… Memories I wish could be more clear so I could tell the person who was me then – stop him, run after him! But I really did nothing [as far as he was concerned] and continued to be indifferent until the 19th of April…

It was a strange day, rainy, with a strange sky. Then at 12 noon, the first black smoke – Like the day before, it seemed to be white at first… Maybe there’s a new Pope finally?…

I recall asking myself, what am I doing here [in St. Peter’s Square]? Don’t I have other things to do?… What’s keeping me here? …

Around 5 p.m., the sky started to clear…[A bit earlier, we saw what looked like white smoke, finally]…

So when Cardinal Estevez came out [on the balcony], celebration erupted - people waved white and yellow handkerchiefs (the papal colors), others waved their caps, others their shirts; there was jumpng, shouting, singing, banners, streamers, clapping, tears, tension… all compressed within this “tiny” shell, waiting for one person only…

When later the Cardinal said “Josephum”, many knew what it meant… I did not - it did not even occur to me… Then at the words “Sancte Romane Ecclesiae Cardinalem Ratzinger”, I remember feeling dejected… [One must read Ratzigirl's account of an actual 'encounter' with the Cardinal in the thread "Encounters with the Future Pope" to appreciate the contex of her indifference].

It lasted all of ten minutes, because soon, the Cross appeared on that huge balcony, and behind it appeared a tiny figure who opened his arms as if to embrace everyone on the Piazza (a gesture, I would learn later, was not in his repertory as a normally shy man)…and when I saw him open his arms, I felt myself melt…and then on the giant screens, there appeared his face, those eyes, shy, apprehensive, almost disconcerted, as he faced an entire city that was hanging on every word he had to say…

For a few seconds, after he had said “Caro fratelli e sorelle…”, it was a face-off – we, the crowd, and him… And what followed was history.

He said the most simple words, and yet profound – from the iron theologian, the Panzerkardinal, God’s Rottweiler (all the names he had been called)… He even seemed to stammer a bit, which for me showed his great humanity, and which contributed finally to strip away that patina of diffidence that still clung to me…

Those eyes, those eyes which blinked, which looked around him on the crowd below… and while you watched him on the giant screens, you had the illusion that he was looking at each one individually.

I felt increasingly uneasy..and I went back home.

I went back home… No one talked of anything else but the new Pope – who he is, what he has done before, new rites, new beginnings, and then there was a special on TV…I went out again that night, still uncaring, despite what I had felt that afternoon at St. Peter’s Square.

But the following Sunday, it was different. I felt I could not miss the event. I woke up early to go to St. Peter’s Square. But the piazza was already packed, so I went to a place near my house where they had installed one of those giant screens… When HE arrived, to the chanting of “Tu illium adiuva…Benedicto Romano episcopo, successori Petri…”, his face showed everything-happiness, apprehension, shyness - a face that was sometimes thoughtful and absorbed, other times acknowledging the public that had gathered there for him.

The homily he delivered was for me the coup de grace. Particularly at the words:
”And now, in this moment, I, a weak servant of God, must take on this daunting task which truthfully is beyond any human capacity. How can I do it? How can I hope to be equal to it? All of you, my friends, have just invoked the hierarchy of saints, represented by the great names that have marked God’s history with mankind.

“And in that manner, even I have been made aware of this: that I am not alone. I do not have to carry by myself that which I could never carry by myself. The communion of God’s saints will protect me, support me and guide me. And dear friends, you will accompany me with your prayers, your forbearance, your love, your faith and your hope…”

I was looking at a man who knew that if he was going to be able to do that which he has been called on to do, it would only be through the grace of God and our prayers. I saw a humble man, such as he had called himself.

Then he spoke about the pallium:
“The first symbol (of Peter) is the Pallium, woven in pure wool, which has been placed across my shoulders. This most ancient of signs, which the Bishops of Rome had carried since the 4th century, can be considered as an image of the yoke of Christ, that the Bishop of this city, servant of the servants of God, takes on his shoulders.

“The yoke of God is God’s will which we welcome. This will is not an external weight which oppresses and takes away our liberty. To know what God wants, to know which is the right way of life- that was the joy of Israel, it was its great privilege. It is also our joy: God’s will does not alienate us, it purifies us – perhaps even in sorrowful manner – in order for us to realize ourselves. In doing God’s will. we serve not only Him, but all the world, all of history.

“The symbolism of the Pallium is also more concrete: the lamb’s wool represents the lost sheep, or the sick one, or the weak one, whom the shepherd takes up on his shoulder and leads to the waters of life.

“The parable of the lost lamb, whom the shepherd seeks in the desert, was, for the Fathers of the Church, an image of the mystery of Christ and of the Church. Humankind – all of us – is the errant lamb which has lost its way in the desert. The Son of God cannot tolerate this: He cannot abandon humankind to such a miserable condition. He leaps to action, abandons the glory of Heaven, in order to rescue the lamb and be with him all the way to the Cross.”

I felt I was that lost lamb, and thought, perhaps for the first time, that I was starting to see the reason for Ratzinger’s election, purely in an egotistic sense. But I started to believe – and I believe so now – that the Holy Spirit had inspired his choice, and that the cardinal electors, who had the choice to say yes or no, chose to say yes.

Then, when he said, addressing us all as “friends”:
“Dear friends, at this moment I can only say one thing: pray for me, that I may always learn to love the Lord more. Pray for me that I may always learn to love his flock more. You, the Holy Church, each of you individually and all of you together, pray for me, pray that I do not seek to escape out of fear in the face of wolves. Let us pray, each for the other, that our Lord sustains us and that we learn to sustain each other” - it was most beautiful… A homily from a university professor.

And then, there was his elegance, his carriage, his style, a true “signore”, a man like whom there is no other …It is 4:20 in the morning…Excuse me…I am falling asleep…

[Ratzigirl resumes her account the next day:]

That most beautiful day of April 24, 2005 – It makes me happy to recount it… A few other details… I live in the memory of that day… Yesterday, I recounted something of the Pope’s inaugural Mass…

That morning… 8 o’clock… One could not sleep beyond that hour…The streets were already full of people making noise… I got up, looked out the window, and looked down on a river of people, literally a river of people, all flowing in one direction…

I get dressed in a hurry, I eat something and proceed to join the flow myself… At 9:30, it is now impossible to get into St. Peter’s Square… Fortunately, they have set up giant screens in many places… I find one and take my place among hundreds who are watching here…

Finally, the ceremony begins at 10:20… On the maxiscreen, we see a man who slowly approaches the tomb of Peter to bless it, him, the successor… In silence – without the horrible TV commentary which ruins all liturgy whenever it is broadcast – we are able to enjoy these beautiful images. The music that now arises is the Laudes Regiae… A tremor runs through all of us when we hear the invocant chant,
“Benedicto,
Romano Pontefici, Petri successori,
suum ministerium hodie inauguranti
sollicitudo pro universa Ecclesia!”

Beautiful!….And he, Joseph Ratzinger, he to whom the chant was addressed, now walks towards the front door of St. Peter’s… And when he appears at the doorway, the cardinals who preceded him are still rendering their homage at the altar… He stops and waits on the steps of St. Peter’s… When his turn comes, he walks surefootedly towards the altar, he kisses it, and then, looking up, he greets us, the faithful, with a liberating smile!

Even we, far from the Piazza, break into applause for this man in gold, who from that day onwards was and is the successor to Peter…

It was most touching when Cardinal Sodano gave him the Fisherman’s Ring, but even more so when the Pallio was placed around his shoulders... At that instant, he made a gesture, a simple move of the head that said far more than any words: ”I do not know how to say Thank you, I am still not up to it.” And all around me, people were saying, “Look, it’s as if he still cannot believe that he is now the Pope.”…

Emotions reached a peak during the homily, interrupted some 30 times by applause…

Most beautiful when he said: “Whoever believes in God is never alone – not in life, not in death.”

Most beautiful when he celebrated the Eucharist, with his hair blown by the wind…

Somewhat sad when, the Pope having mounted the Popemobile for the first time, we saw an image on TV of two brothers – Georg and Joseph, almost like mirror images – the older brother looking at the youngest in his family, gentle Georg who put on dark glasses to hide his emotions… Joseph greets him with a slight nod… Two brothers who had been inseparable whenever they could be together, especially after the death of their only sister in 1991… Whose fraternal relations became even closer after that, now that there were only the two of them in their old age… And in that fleeting look, caught on a maxiscreen, we all felt the torment one must feel when the brother with whom you had shared everything you could up to this moment, has been called to a higher task… When you know it will no longer be easy to be as close to him… Joseph’s look seemed to say he understood all this but that nothing had changed between them, that for Georg, he would always and only be Joseph…

[She breaks off her narration here…I don’t know about you, but I, too, rereading this account, always find myself overwhelmed at this point by the poignancy of this personal drama which Ratzigirl seems to live in total empathy…

Weeks later, after she has moved out of Rome to live near Florence – I gather she goes to school and does theater work there – she comes back one weekend to visit her parents and goes to St. Peter’s for the Angelus on 6/19/05]:

I have just come back from the Sunday Angelus at St. Peter’s.

Today was a magnificent day – even if it started to turn a bit too warm around noon. But all that was forgotten, when the curtains of the Papal study were drawn aside and we saw the tiny white figure face us from that window…

From where I was, that was all I could see – a tiny figure in the distance. I was near the left fountain, the one farther away [from the Apostolic Palace]. I had expected to find not too many people – on such a fine day, everyone would have gone to the beach – but no, it was so crowded that it would have been impossible for me to try and make my way towards the closer fountain…

But I was soon comforted by his voice… ”Cari fratelli e sorelle” – As soon as he says that, the crowd goes wild… The enthusiasm spreads like a wave – and he extends his arms as though to bless everyone… It is highly emotional when you hear around you the voices, the cries, the (expressions of) love for this man which pervades the shell-shaped Piazza…

And then, when he leads the Angelus, quiet recollection… I note happily that when the Pope leads the Angelus (or says any other prayer aloud, for that matter), he never sounds perfunctory (as unfortunately, one often experiences) but says the words with full involvement…

He had beautiful words to say about refugees earlier, reminding us that “No one is a stranger in the house of God” (let us not forget that he, too, is a foreigner in our land)…

I cannot describe the emotions in the crowd when he started to extend the customary greetings [to the various language groups] after the prayers – it was sheer jubilation! The Piazza seemed to explode with the outcry whenever he said, “I greet the ____-speaking pilgrims here today…” Shouts of “Viva il Papa!” Mass chanting of the now-familiar “Be-ne-det-to!” Groups raising streamers, banners, posters. Individuals waving – with bare hands, handkerchiefs or caps.

I assure you it was highly emotional every time it was repeated. And through his open microphone, every time it happened, one could hear a voice murmuring gently, “Krazie…”

This comes from Beatrice in the French section. My translation:
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A French Catholic daily newspaper, Present (unfortunately, with a very limited circulation), is to my knowledge, the only French publication that has always supported Benedict XVI, that has assured him of its affection, and which has continued to provide us at least once a week with an update on the Pope’s activities, reported in terms that we would like to see in media with far great circulation.

It was in coming across this paper by chance that I “discovered” Cardinal Ratzinger, not very long before April 19, but I learned enough to be very pleased when he was elected. Read for yourself the report that the paper’s correspondent filed from Rome for the issue of April 20, 2005. Instead of running it in the “Media and News” thread, I think it merits being posted as a “personal account.”
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Immense joy sweeps through St. Peter’s Square
By Olivier Figueras

“Annuntio vobis gaudium magnum: Habemus Papam.”

The solemn ritual phrase resounded under the Roman sky. It was with a strong voice that the Cardinal Protodeacon Estevez Medina revealed to the city and to the world the name of the chosen one: Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger “who has taken the name Benedict XVI.”

An immense joy, indescribable, engulfed the crowds in St. Peter’s Square, on the via della Conciliazione, and farther out, throughout the city, and - thanks to the wonders of technology - to the extreme ends of the earth.

The day had begun badly. The weather had turned nasty, and perhaps influenced by a capricious sun, the tens of thousands who crowded the Piazza seemed doubtful tnat there would be a quick end to the Conclave. Just before noon, black smoke coming from the Sistine Chapel only reinforced the uncertainty.

But the faith of simple folk is tenacious. When I returned just before 4 p.m. to post myself beneath the "chimney of anticipation", I noticed that many of those I had left hours earlier had remained in place.

Then as the hour advanced, the crowd started to swell, and groups unfurled flags from different nations and the most diverse of cultures. Perched on her father’s shoulders, a little girl tirelessly waved in the persistent wind the tricolor of “the Church’s oldest daughter,” France, my France…

It is almost 4 p.m. A collective movement from the crowd draws me back to the moment. One look at the chimney convinces me – the smoke that started to come out could not be anything else but grey at worst, not black; it was too early for it to be otherwise. The cardinals could not have had the time, materially, to vote twice this afternoon… And a few seconds later, large puffs of white smoke confirmed what I already knew: we had a Pope.

I could hardly see the smoke now; my eyes had filled with tears. I cried, like an orphan who has just regained a father.

And when the bells of St. Peter confirmed the great news, the crowd exploded in cheers, singing broke out, along with cries wishing long life to the new Pope – whose name was still not known.

It was a miracle in itself that the mortal duel that had been predicted, the fratricidal war between so-called conservatives against so-called reformists, had not taken place. Not in only 26 hours of Conclave!

And at that moment, a crazy thought, a conservative notion, crossed my mind – perhaps less crazy than it might have been to some of us just a few hours earlier.

It was some 40 minutes later that Cardinal Medina, spokesman as it were for the Sacred College of Cardinals, appeared on the central balcony of St. Peter’s Basilica. In a strong voice, but slowly, too slowly for our thread-thin impatience, he informs us of what we all ardently waited for: Josephum! The first name alone sufficed to confirm my crazy hope.

And when we learned for sure that Cardinal Ratzinger was the chosen one – Benedict XVI – the joy of the crowd turned to delirium.

Cardinal Ratzinger! He who, in meditations written for Good Friday last March, had decried that Peter’s boat was leaking in too many places. He who, just yesterday morning, before the Conclave began, denounced the “dictatorship of relativism” and reaffirmed the Credo of the Church.

He has things to say, and he will say them, and Benedict XVI, we expect it of him, will affirm so many other things that need to be affirmed.

Already, the advocates for an even greater “opening to the world” by the Catholic Church had lost one battle, and they knew it.

The grimacing in the media was obvious… Just imagine! Ratzinger as Pope – he who would define Europe as Christian! Not to mention his ideas about Pius X’s Mass… In short: the standard-bearer of the “conservatives” at the heart of the Sacred College, the one who was the target of all their diatribes, all their attacks, all their malice!

Meanwhile, the Cardinals who had given back a Father to the faithful, a Father for Rome and for the Church, deserved gratitude in every language.

And now, Pope Benedict XVI, for the first time, bestows his blessing to the city and to the world.

Benedetto – Tirelessly and in every language, the faithful cry out again and again the name of their new Holy Father: Benedetto, Benedict, Benedictus.

Yes indeed, as in Benedictus qui venit in nomine Domini!! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.


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FROM A GERMAN FAN




She joined this forum in June - a German housewife who lives in Italy, and speaks and writes Italian as well as she does her mother tongue. She calls herself rosa-la-tedesca (Rosa, the German woman) and uses a snow-white gardenia as an avatar. This is the story she finally shared with the forum a few weeks after signing up. In translation from the Italian-

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IT HAPPENED ON AN APRIL EVENING

I have reflected much whether I should tell my story of that unforgettable evening which has left its mark forever on my soul. It is a very personal matter and not easy to put on display. But I have decided to do it as testimony to a great event, to an experience very much out of the common but which, strangely, appears to have happened to many others. So here goes-

That fateful evening of the white plume of smoke, I was seated with my family in front of the TV. I was interested in what was, after all, a historic event, although I have not considered myself a Catholic for years. I had dissociated myself from the Church and its teachings. But as a girl, I had loved going to Church. I loved religious instruction and my book of Bible stories. I prayed often. We were taught to always be on guard that we did not stray away too far from God, and saddened by just the thought of doing that, I prayed: My Good Lord, if I ever should stray away from you, then please don"t let me fall down!

Later, however, as I grew up and saw how things were in the world, little by little it seemed impossible to me that there could exist a God. Who was good. I found myself angry at God most of the time. He seemed so unfair and arbitrary. There was too much suffering among the innocent, the little ones, the defenseless, while among those who professed themselves believers and counted themselves among the faithful, I saw little of their Christianity. And He, the Lord, seemed indifferent.

So in the end, I stopped going to Mass. The Church, I felt, had nothing to say to me. I stopped praying - or tried to  because I was convinced that it was nothing but a monologue addressed to a void.

I started to see the Church as anachronistic, out of step with the times, something medieval. The sound of bells, which used to make my heart feel like celebrating, now irritated me. As a housewife, Sunday became for me a day like any other.

Meanwhile, I wondered how the Pope and most of his clergy could believe in a book that was 2000 years old or more. But I kept my respect for persons who were truly devout, and I always felt a sympathy for John Paul II because I saw him as a profoundly good person. I did not end up following him because I was not interested in pursuing a religion that often seemed to me the very opposite of love.

I could have found reasons to think otherwise, but I was truly angry about the Church. I forced myself not to believe in anything, and I almost succeeded. It was the dark night of my life. I knew that I had to escape the void if I wanted to go on living. So I interested myself in other religions, and to the extent that it was possible for me, even in science, philosophy and other topics.

But I never bothered to study more of the Catholic religion because I was convinced I knew it well enough. Eventually, I worked out for myself that the answers we seek may lie only within us, after all. Truth would be whatever I felt myself in synchrony with, whatever resonated in my soul. Or perhaps I would have to guess at it by myself - to guess what truth was! I was convinced I would never again be able to embrace a 'pre-fabricated' faith.

That was my internal state that evening of April 19. I was a bit curiouis to learn who had become Pope, but I hardly knew any of the papabili from the superficial reading I did of the media.

My husband had mentioned Ratzinger. I watched him during the Pope's funeral, but he did not make any particular impression on me. Besides, I had heard a little of what was being said about him, so I thought it would be better if someone other than him were elected, perhaps one who would be a surprise to everyone, as Papa Wojtyla was. Otheriwse, I did not really care.

Very well. Now, the red drapes on the balcony have opened and Cardinal Estevez has announced "Habemus Papam". He seemed to imitate Jerry Scotti when he says, "I tell you, I tell you not, I tell you later". We joked about it. Then finally he mentioned Ratzinger"s name. Eh! After all, it seemed predictable!

And then, Ratzinger himself came out to the balcony. I was not enthusiastic. Not the first moment. Then I do not know what happened. I felt a strong tug in my heart - as if my eyes were opened for the first time and I could look into the soul of this man with the somewhat diffident appearance, who looked almost as if he was asking to be excused for having been elected Pope! I felt tears welling up in me.

The crowd on the Piazza was jubilant, and I could not understand what was happening to me. I was caught completely unprepared. I was living through a sort of 'Ecce homo' experience, as if somebody had told me: "There he is - all that you were looking for you will find in him". My heart filled with affection for this man. I was completely undone.

In the following days, I sought out all the information I could about the new Pope. The Internet proved to be a most invaluable resource. I found out he had written many books and quickly ordered some. I bought all the magazines that came out with articles and photographs about him, happy to discover, for instance, that I shared many preferences with the new Pope. I was especially drawn to the articles written by Peter Seewald, the journalist with which Ratzinger had authored the interview books Salt of the Earth and God and the world.

The first book that arrived and with which it seemed only right that I start my new approach to the faith was Introduction to Christianity. I had to learn all over what the word 'believe' means, so I could free myself from the erroneous ideas and false expectations that I had constructed. Other books followed, and still others have arrived, waiting to be read.

I had never before read anything that brought the figure of Christ and the love of God so near to me. His books are not always easy reading, but I could see that every word was written with the firmness of faith. Now I know what things I can believe and whose word to trust.

And my certainty was reinforced when I heard the words of welcome that a bishop used for the Pope when he went to Bari: "Benedetto colui che viene nel nome del Signore" - Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord. It is not possible to say it any better.

Now I know that God never abandoned me, but that he often took me by the hand even if I remained stubborn. And finally he said "Enough" to my obstinacy. Maybe he did hear the prayer of that girl that I was, and probably somebody else also prayed for me. She is someone whom I would like to get to know more, and I am glad I have taken the first steps in the right direct direction.

I now believe that my disengagement from God served to let me leave behind my childhood faith so that I could return to Him with a mature and conscious faith. Not that I think I now understand everything. I will always have an infinity of questions. But I know now that I can continue to trust even when I do not understand.

Now I find myself upset when I hear certain prejudiced comments made about the Pope, especially when they come from people whom I would not have thought capable of prejudice. One of my friends the other day, speaking to me, spouted the worst of these prejudices, calling him a Nazi even. I was dumbfounded.

This friend, besides being an educated and cultured person, is also a believer with many highly-placed acquaintances among the clergy. I asked him what his convictions were based on and whether he had ever read anything written by Ratzinger. He said no, he had never bothered. But he had read what was written about him in the papers, and so, he said, one knew exactly what type of person he was - one only had to look at the result of his work! I advised him to read anything written by Ratzinger that did not concern his work at the Vatican. I can only hope he will do so and change his mind.

The worst thing is that until a few weeks ago, I would have listened to my friend's negative opinions without objection, because he was a trusted friend whom I would have believed without any reservation.

I am mortified. Now I want to defend this Pope and what he stands for with sword drawn and defying everyone: woe to anyone who touches him, because I will cut off their ears!

At the same time, I feel somewhat ridiculous because I look at myself and ask: "Are you sure you are still all right in the brain?"

I am hoping to meet many persons in this forum with whom I can exchange ideas and impressions.

I wish to thank Ratzigirl again because through her initiative, she has provided us with the possibility to express ourselves. This is the meeting place for the 'Ordine Benedettino delle sorelle delle Sante Coccole' - a name which made me die of laughter (including when they exaggerate a bit!), but one feels the sincere interest and profound devotion that motivates them. I greet you all.

thanks to all for your tearful accounts-tears of choy and love for Papa ..ill have mine soon!

Thank you so much, Teresa and all. It’s so moving to read these first-hand experiences of the events that afternoon at St. Peter’s Square.
gRA(T)Zie……ehh….kRA(T)Zie

A nice photo of Papa

gracelp... when do you go to Rome??? I'm going in March! My RCIA class doesn't meet for 2 weeks as Father is leading a trip to the Holyland. While they're in Israel I'll be in Rome... soaking up the sights and just...

LutheranGUest - Could that be one of the earliest photos ever taken of Papa as Pope? It looks like it was taken the first time he left the Sistine Chapel after getting dressed as Pope to proceed to the Loggia of the Benediction. I hope you found more in the series and can share them with us!

Beatrice from the French section has decided to share her own
account of April 19 and its effect on her. My translation-

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I myself felt the need to lay down on paper what I felt last April 19th. And so I wrote down my thoughts just after the new Pope was elected, a text that I had intended to be for my eyes only, because, being reserved by nature, I had no intention of sharing it with anyone. But now, after having participated in this forum, I don’t feel as embarassed to think others will read it, because now I know I am not the only one to have felt this way…



Tuesday, 19 April 2005, 18:57 …
Like everyone else, I am in front of the TV.

I feel feverish, but for a rather trite reason – it is simply due to my impatience to find out, to see… a confused sensation of mounting tension which would soon resolve – not unlike what one feels at the movies just before the end of a thriller. Besides, I had hardly haunted the churches since I was a teenager, and I am still convinced that faith is a grace which was not granted to me.

Like everyone, too, I now knew the identity of the new Pope, and, as announced by the Chilean Cardinal Proto-deacon Medina, that he had chosen the name Benedict XVI. But the name of Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger itself told me very little – I only knew that he was considered to be conservative (which pleases me), and that during the meditations he wrote for the Way of the Cross on Good Friday, he had made strong statements about the Church, (which he described as) a leaky boat that was taking in water in too many places…

Then, the red curtains of the Basilica’s Loggia of Benedictions opened as in a theater … And it was a revelation!

“HE” appeared, he opened his arms to us in a loving gesture, a father’s gesture, as if he wanted to embrace us all close to him, and he smiled…

He spoke in Italian, a gentle voice with a trace of fatigue, a voice that had a slight tremor, betraying apprehension and shyness in front of this immense crowd, and he seemed to trip over the words of a language he has mastered but is not his own, under the stress of a profound emotion that he just managed to control, and which instantaneously touched me
because he seemed so fragile and human.

Then he gave us his blessing – now his age did not count, he was transfigured by the serenity and light that he radiated. Nothing else seemed to exist but that radiance…

Afterwards, I felt light and joyful. I telephoned my mother to share with her that moment of happiness, I would even say that moment of grace…

For me, something truly special happened that day. As if a door had opened. Only much later, when reviewing the tapes of the event, did I realize that he was beautiful, with that gentle smiling face, its features fine and delicate as that of a child.

To whoever may object that this humanly banal infatuation has nothing spiritual about it, and that it seems closer to idolatry than to Revelation, I would reply that the Lord, if He exists (but how can one doubt now that he exists?), could well choose this human way to manifest himself. After all, the apostles probably started by loving Jesus as a person.

And his beauty - the face still so pure, and smooth as porcelain - which radiates goodness, can only be a gift of God.

So, after that intense moment, I have reflected on several things:

First, how can one not believe in predestination? He himself said once, in one of his books which I read later, “God has a plan for me.” Before he became Pope.

How can one not believe that God had a purpose when he caused this person to be born into a simple but exceptional family (one must read what he says of them in his memoirs) in rural Bavaria, a region so profoundly marked by Catholicism (even today!), and endowed him with truly exceptional gifts which he has used only to seek and accomplish good – when less than 20 kilometers away, 40 years earlier, along the banks of the same river, the Inn, that incarnation of evil called Adolf Hitler was born!

Benedict’s age is a challenge to a society which worships the appearance of youth like the Golden Calf, and sends a message of courage and hope (and yes, of pride) to those whom one calls “old”. Because his incredibly youthful face radiates a serene energy which confers him with iconic value.

After all, one cannot but be impressed by the trajectory followed by a little Bavarian boy from modest peasant stock, who rose to the highest position in the Catholic Church, having been already, as Prefect of the CDF, one of the 100 most influential persons in the world, according to a Time magazine survey.

His story must be gratifying to the enthusiasts of democracy and its so-called upward mobility, but it also proves the incredible capacity of the Church – with its pyramidal structure, its aristocratic system of electing the Pope, and its monarchical government – to promote the true merit of excellence…

To conclude, I would love to cite something I gathered the day after the Papal election on the street (to be more precise, at the supermarket checkout line). Looking at the giant photo of the new Pope on page 1 of the Figaro newspaper which I had just bought, a lady told me – after she had deplored, like most everybody else, his "advanced age" and noted my reticence regarding her views – “He carries saintliness on his face.” One could not have said it better. Vox populi…

Beatrice, 22 April 2005

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Scritto da: NanMN 13/12/2005 1.39
gracelp... when do you go to Rome??? I'm going in March! My RCIA class doesn't meet for 2 weeks as Father is leading a trip to the Holyland. While they're in Israel I'll be in Rome... soaking up the sights and just...

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i dont know,Nan:(..i hope someday to see Papa upclose,in the meantime,i still feel close to him bia this wonderful forum and friends

oh,how i envy you!

Sylvie posted today in the French section her story on how she became a Benaddict...Her narrative style is quite distinctive.
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John-Paul is gone and I am very unhappy. I buy the newspapers, I cut out pictures.

April 8
I am in tears in front of the TV. I am listening to this gentle voice – he sounds so sad, moved, sincere..
Joseph Ratzinger – the crowd applauds his words, so beautiful…
At the end of the Mass, my grief has not gone, but my mind has started to think about another person.

A few more days go by.
Still sad for me.
But then, I decide to start research on the Internet.
The first thing I see nails me to my chair!
Am I dreaming? A fan club? A cardinal with a fan club?
I burst out laughing. It’s crazy!
So…he is known and loved!…I read, I discover, I fall under the charm of his personality, his work.
On April 14, I join the fan club.

The Conclave:
I am irritated by the media and their predictions: he doesn’t have a chance, they say. They’re talking too much about him.
But in reading that, perhaps…it could be…I start to wish with all my strength that it will be HE.

But I have no power in this. I need help, and I know whom to address. With all my heart, I ask the help of my two intercessors [John-Paul II and her recently deceased father, as she tells us in the next paragraph] that I be given Joseph as Pope.

Tuesday, the 19th:
My dad having preceded John-Paul two months earlier, I still have not gotten over mourning them, not to mention some administrative problems… So today, I am in very bad shape, indeed.

I have just enough strength to sit in front of the computer, answer my e-mail, read the latest updates on the Conclave.

Around 5 p.m., I turn on the radio to an all-news station, and they announce white smoke!
Ooops, quick, the TV!
But NOTHING! Just a small running band at the bottom of the screen on France-5.
I telephone my mother, very excited…
Then, the bells (of St. Peter’s) start ringing, and only then do our French channels deign to interrupt their pathetic programming to turn to Rome…

The minutes are interminable.

When finally, Cardinal Medina Estevez appears, I think it is the new Pope, and I ask myself- “Zut! Him?”
My poor brain is tired and does not even realize it can’t be what I think.

The announcement in Latin seems interminable…
“Josephum”… Eh??
And just as I feel crushed by wonder, the TV commentator adds: “Ratzinger!” and goes on with banalities and commentary which rob the moment of all charm…

But the Latin sentence continues and confirms: “Cardinalem Ratzinger qui sibi…”

The circuit gets reconnected in my brain.
I can think again and I scream:
“No, no! It’s not true, it’s not true!”- I kept crying out between sobs and laughter.

(But) I have everything on – TV, radio, the Net – and they all confirm it…
I look up to heaven and thank those I had asked to intercede….

Then, he appears… The crowd’s enthusiasm let loose…
His words so full of emotion…
How beautiful he is and how I love him…
Every time I replay the video, I melt into tears.

Outside, life goes on…cars are in motion…people come and go.
I look at them, stunned…I want to scream at them: “Hey, stop! Don’t you know? It is Joseph who is our new Pope!”
But I don’t even hear any bells.

Nobody cares? When the city or the country wins a sports event, everything comes to a standstill, and one cannot escape the tooting horns.
But a new Pope? Pouf!

I am terribly happy and terribly disappointed.
I delay going back to Rome, to watch the images again, to hear him…

I go back and forth, in the room and in my head. Alone with such joy – whom will I share it with?
It is too much for me!
The fan club? Of course…
The TV? Bah! (They’re talking) Nazi…conservative…other cruel words that are stupid, vile, repugnant…

But my joy manages to drown out all this malice.
The Net reacts fast – I should start sorting out reactions…
It is there where I will find enthusiasm and happiness…
I am no longer alone in thanking God, and since that day, my life has changed…

Eugenia tells her story in two parts… First, she was replying to Ratzigirl’s rueful account of how she had ignored Ratzi at a time when she could have met him every day as he went to work; then subsquently, Eugenia describes her April 19 experience in another post. Herewith, in translation -
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Like you (she tells Ratzigirl) I was very distant from the Church and anything that had to do with it during the time that coincided more or less with your estrangement. I had a negative opinion of Cardinal Ratzinger, not out of any personal knowledge, but because at that time, everyone spoke very badly of him, making him out to be a cold, unpleasant and arid person who was exaggeratedly dedicated to excommunications!

That went on until the funeral Mass for JPII. When I learned that it would be none other than Ratzinger who would celebrate the Mass, my first thought was “Well, imagine that insensitive German with his cold and impassive face….!”

Instead, it was precisely on that occasion when I realized that he was not at all what his denigrators made him out to be! I saw his face, how he looked very moved, and the gestures that betrayed the emotions of someone who was suffering the loss of a friend.

From that day on, I hoped and prayed that the Lord would give him to us as Pope and spiritual guide. From that day on, I started to pray again, and now, I do not want to miss out on any of his Christian teachings.

I wish him all the best, and at night when I go to sleep, I wish that the love and esteem I have for him could help in some way to protect him from all the gratuitous ill-will that even now some still bear towards him.

I wanted to tell you this to show you were not alone in having such a wrong idea of Ratzi, but the important thing is having recognized that in time.

The next part she writes as a reaction to stupor-mundi’s memoir (see below):

Hi! …I too lived April 19 as an unforgettable day. I was scheduled to leave on April 20 for a trip of a few days with a friend of mine, and as we were discussing the succession to JPII, I said, “They’ll probably end up choosing the new Pope the day before we leave or the day after,” while in my heart, I was hoping it would be Ratzinger.

The following day was the 19th, and as I was leaving for home from work, my mother called me to say there was a new Pope but that he had yet to appear. I ran home to be sure to make it in time to see who was JP’s successor.

Arriving home, the TV was on but still nothing… I sat there in trepidation, hoping, praying, “Lord, please, let it be him.” The weather was dismal. That whole day, in the district where I lived, it rained the whole day and the sky was grey and heavy.

Suddenly, the announcement – which I heard distractedly – it was him, JOSEPH RATZINGER, now Benedict XVI , and I couldn’t contain my joy… His expression, his emotions when he spoke, captivated me, and while I was listening to his first words as Pope, I looked out the window, and a ray of sunlight pierced through the clouds… Thinking of it now, I am very moved.

That is the memory that I will keep indelibly of that afternon, and for all my life, I will never forget the joy and the emotion of participating in that moment. THANK YOU, JOSEPH.

Stupor-mundi re-lives her April 19

In the thread "Encounters with the Future Pope", stupor-mundi recounts, among other things, how she first saw Ratzi at a 1992 conference to present a new book when she was a student at the Catholic University of Milan. The last part of her memoir is her experience of April 19, whichI have excerpted because it belongs to this thread.
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...I wish to share my memories of another day which will always be etched in my mind as, I believe, it is in those of many others. April 19 2005.

That day, in the late afternoon, I was at the hospital. I was visiting my father who had undergone testing and we were all anxiously awaiting the results. We watched TV together in his hospital room. Finally, the smoke was white and crowds were gathering in St. Peter’s Square.

Since John-Paul died, I had been hoping that the Church, under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, would have a new Pope who would be a beacon, a man of God, and only one man came to my mind (who met the criteria).

When I saw the white smoke, I prepared to leave and told my father I would come back the following day. I wanted to be at home to watch the new Pope come out on the Loggia of Benedictions. But my mother insisted, “Let us stay, and let us all watch the blessing together.”

I agreed. The waiting lasted more than usual, but at a certain poin,t the cardinal proto-deacon finally appeared. At the words “…eminentissimum ac reverendissimum dominum, dominum: Josephum…”, I burst out: “It’s Ratzinger!” I was almost in tears from joy… After the new Pope’s blessing, I bid goodbye again to my father, saying I would be back the following day.

And the following morning, we were called in by the doctors – all the test results came back negative, and Papa could go home.

So I like to think that Benedict XVI may have worked his first miracle precisely for us.

This article appeared in an Italian newspaper on April 20 and concerns the dean of Vatican reporters, 85-year-old Arcangelo
Paglialunga:

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This time, the Holy Spirit read the newspapers

To whoever asked him in the past few days for a name, he replied invariably: “No predictions. Luckily, the Holy Spirit does not read the papers.” Clarifying immediately thereafter, however, that the line isn’t his – it was famously said four decades ago by Cardinal Agaganian, one who knew about Conclaves.

Arcangelo Paglialunga, 85 years old, of the Gazzettino di Venezia, wished to keep his personal rule during this, the fifth Conclave he has covered. Although, in his heart, he must have rooted for Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, whom he often met mornings on St. Peter’s Square. The dean of the College of Cardinals would be on his way to work at the Palazzo Sant’Uffizio, the dean of Vatican journalists on his way to the Vatican Press Office.

It was to Paglialunga that Ratzinger had confided, years before the text was publicly revealed: “There is nothing catastrophic about the third secret of Fatima.”

With Paglialunga, who was a friend of the composer Perosi, the cardinal, who loves Gregorian chant, often discussed church music.

It was from him the cardinal learned that Monsignor Lefebvre had died. That morning, the cardinal had not yet seen the papers.

Paglialunga says jestingly, now that “his” cardinal, one of the favored candidates before the Conclave, has become Benedict XVI, “Well, maybe the Holy Spirit does read the papers sometimes.”

And he, who had steadfastly refused to be drawn into any predictions, says simply: “ He will be a great Pope, because Joseph Ratzinger is an extraordinary man.”

IT is an opinion from someone who can be trusted. Because he has truly seen a lot in the five Conclaves of his career.

Starting with the “duel” between Cardinals Agaganian and Roncalli (who became John XXIII). “I remember that we attended a Mass said by the Armenian Cardinal,” he says. “After the Mass, probably noting our presence, he said, 'Fortunately, the Holy Spirit does not read the papers.’”

That time, however, the Cardinal was right. Entering the Conclave as Pope, he came out, as the saying went, still a cardinal. The choice fell on the less-predicted Cardinal Roncalli, Patriarch of Venice. Who, later, visiting his Armenian colleague in Rome, would describe, with his customary goodnatured irony, that extraordinary electoral battle with the Armenian.

John XXIII said, “Our names bobbed up and down (that is, they alternated in the lead) like chickpeas in boiling water.” Perhaps because of that lengthy head-to-head contest, recalls Paglialunga, even the pontifical master of ceremonies at that time, Monsignor Dante, instead of opening the box holding the large cassock (for Roncalli) opened the box with the small one (which would have fit Agaganian).

After a few months, Papa Roncalli himself, meeting with journalists, added a footnote to the Conclave: “He told us that the night after his election, not being able to sleep, he asked to see the newspapers from the day before. ‘None of you guessed the outcome,’ he said, ‘but I forgive you all anyway.'” That was Papa Roncalli.

The journalists did better five years later with Paul VI. But that time, Paglialunga jests, “I also changed my sources.” Forget about other journalists. Better go with vox populi. “I was working for Momento Sera then. Our editor asked us to find out what people were saying at St. Peter’s Square, and I interviewed dozens of people. 'Who do you want to be Pope?' The consensus was in favor of Montini. So I called my editor and told him. When Montini did become Pope, the editor thanked me, saying it was only after I called that they prepared something about the Archbishop of Milan (Montini), in addition to what they already prepared on Cardinal Ottaviani and other so-called conservatives.” Vox populi, vox Dei in this case.

For John Paul I 15 years later, the voice was a technician from Radio Vatican. He was assigned to prepare the microphones in the central Loggia of the Basilica. Not aware that the intercom to the Press Room was open, the technician remarked, “I have been sent to prepare the microphone lines because the new Pope is about to give his blessing.” That is how the journalists learned before the white smoke was seen that a new Pope had been chosen (Albino Luciani, the Patriarch of Venice).

Other times, other memories. Yesterday, in this age of digitals, cell phones and the Internet, none of the above happened. But it needed the bells of St. Peter’s to clear away any doubts about the color of the smoke!

Casa Santa Marta, the comfortable hotel which houses the Conclave participants, has improved Conclave conditions greatly. This avoids a situation where a cardinal who needs a special diet has to order out for his meals, as did a Chinese cardinal during the conclave that elected John XXIII. “A young priest was assigned to make sure that every day he would get a bowl of chicken soup.”

Or that someone, like Cardinal Suenens in the first Conclave of 1978, finds himself responding to another cardinal who knocks on his cell in a bathrobe and asks to take a shower in his room because there was none in his own cell.

John Paul II, who had lived through those two conclaves of 1978, had Casa San Marta built to improve those conditions.

"Even in that, he was an innovator," Paglialunga remarks.

Anna67 in the main forum shares her experience of the Benedict effect:
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I want to share with you sisters the joy of this Christmastime –for me absolutely the most joyous because into my life has come il bel Joseph, whom I love so much I dream of him all the time and I think of him every minute.

He has made me rediscover the faith which I lost when I was 18 –at that time, I thought only of amusing myself, of money, of pride, “collecting” boys and experiencing intense emotions!

But that morning of April 8, when I entered the church of Maria Ausiliatrice in Turin (my native city) to watch the funeral services for JP-II, I saw HIM – marvelous as he read that most touching homily for his departed friend – and I felt like I had been struck by lightning!

Everything changed – he made me realize the true sense of life, true joy which I already had but did not realize: a wonderful husband and a wonderful nine-year-old daughter, and a decent job – for all of which I should be thanking God, and do.

But he – il grande Joseph - has totally captured my heart and my mind, and I cannot bear to think of when he won’t be with us... I think I would go mad with grief….

For a change of pace, I'd like to run this piece from one of my favorite bloggers,
CurtJester at splendoroftruth.com.
If you have not visited his site at all, please do so regularly. he's loads of fun -
and he's traditional orthodox Catholic!
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April 19, 2005
Pope Benedict XVI



Right now I am so full of adrenaline I think I could explode. Thank you Lord for Pope Benedict XVI. All of the news build up about Cardinal Ratzinger appearing to be favored I took with a large grain of salt. I have had nothing but admiration for this man as I have read his books since coming into the Catholic Church. His insights and understanding about the problems the Church faces in the modern world are excellent. His book on the liturgy, which I think should be required reading, is magnificent in his presentation of what should be the "reform of the reform" when it comes to the liturgy. His announcement as Pope to me is like Charlie Brown finally getting to kick the football that Lucy was holding. How many times did we hear "enter a pope, leave a cardinal" or that probably somebody who we don't even expect will be elected pope. I am currently in the middle of his book "God and the World" which is a fairly long book where he answers questions put to him by Peter Seewald. Reading the answers he gave I often though what a magnificent pope he would make.

Of course besides having this wonderful man as Pope we get the added bonus of him really annoying the dissidents. Probably one of the quietest place on earth was the offices of the National Catholic Reporter. For myself I was jumping up and down and screaming with excitement when his name was announced. All those who had hoped for changes in the doctrines of the Catholic Church now know that it isn't going to happen any time soon. No matter though who was elected this would have been true, it is just that they now realize it and once again will have to fallback to "maybe the next pope." position

Before I started reading Catholic blogs I had been following Christopher Blosser's Cardinal Ratzinger Fan Club, which for some reason is unavailable (possibly all of a sudden having millions of hits might have something to do with it). I am all for the Pope Benedict XVI fan club.

Here is a post I did before that included our new Holy Father is his superhero persona as "Magisterial Man."

March 21, 2003
Mighty Morphin Power Theologians



A mild-mannered theologian by day Cardinal Ratzinger when provoked by the progressive forces of evil
becomes "Magisterial Man!" Together in union with the Holy Father his sharp wits
cut through the arguments of the dissenters.